I don't expect you to understand the bond between a man and his cat
by DorianWilde
Summary: My second contribution for huntbastian-week! Anything to do with school-life! "HUNTER! I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GOING TO KILL YOUR FUCKING CAT!" "And why is that, Sebastian?" Hunter asked his roommate calmly as Sebastian stopped in front of him. Sebastian threw something at him, the thing bouncing off his blazer landing on the table next to his laptop. "Is that... a dead bird?"


**AN: You know the drill, check out my novel-lenght hp/glee crossover, Sebastian/Albus-Severus. New chapter up later today! Oh, and this fic turned out funnier than I first intended, first world problem... Enjoy :) - Dorian**

"HUNTER! I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GOING TO KILL YOUR FUCKING CAT!"

Hunter sighed, saving the essay he'd been writing on his laptop. He'd thought he'd be able to get some quiet-time in the choir-room as practise wasn't for another two hours.

Apparently not.

"And why is that, Sebastian?" Hunter asked his roommate calmly as Sebastian stopped in front of him. Sebastian threw something at him, the thing bouncing off his blazer landing on the table next to his laptop. "Is that... a dead bird?" Hunter made a disgusted face. It was a half-eaten dead bird.

"It's a dead warbler", Sebastian got out through gritted teeth. "You know, the bird you we're supposed to take care of, being the newest member?"

"Ah."

"I hope to God you never have children, Clarington, because if this is how you define 'take care of'-"

"Calm down, Smythe. Are you sure it's _the_ warbler."

"Yes, this is Pavarotti the fifth. Or at least it was until Pussy-"

"Mr Puss-" Hunter corrected automatically.

"-brutally murdered him", Sebastian continued, ignoring his input, sending a death glare his way.

"Look, Mr Puss is a cat, and Pavarotti is, was, a bird. It's instincts-" Hunter tried to reason.

"I hate your cat."

"Don't insult my cat-"

"It's a fucking menace!" Sebastian snapped, pacing back and forth. "He, he growls at me all the time. He always sleeps on my bed, and hisses at me when _I_ try to lay there. Yesterday he scratched me, today, when I tried to save Pavarotti, he bit me _and_ he threw up a hairball on my sexy jeans." Sebastian ended his diatribe, turning to towards at Hunter. "Hunter, are you crying?"

"No", Hunter denied, half-choked. "I have allergies."

"Are you seriously crying because I don't like the menace?" Sebastian asked incredulously.

"I don't expect you to understand the bond between a man and his cat", Hunter sniffed.

"Why am I dating you again?" Sebastian asked rhetorically, sitting down next to him with a sigh. In all other situations Hunter was as badass as he looked, but when it involved mr Puss, he became more hypersensitive than a teenage girl with PMS. He kissed his cheek, then leaned back with his arms crossed, still annoyed. Hunter heaved a sigh.

"Look, back in Colorado Springs, at the Military academy..."

**Two years ago**

"_Put your back into it, Hunter!"_

"_Sir yes sir!" Hunter immediately answered, lifting the barbell over his head once more, looking out across the field where his teaches had prepared a kind of track-course for them. He could do anything they asked of him, except..._

"_Run to the next station! Move it! Move it! Move it!" their instructor shouted._

"_Sir yes sir", the students answered as one. The complete dread filling him made it hard to breathe, but he steeled himself._

This time, _he promised himself. _This time I won't be scared.

_Ten Schaefer dogs sat obediently in front of the group of students. Wiping his sweaty palms against his pants, Hunter repeated the words in his head._

This time I won't be scared.

"_Alright, remember who your partner is! Run off with you!" Ten of the students ran away in different directions across the field, Hunter amongst them._

_He'd always been... anxious around dogs. And dogs noticed that._

_Heart pounding, he realized the others had already run off with their dogs, using them to search for their partners. He quickened his pace, looking for a decent hiding place, ending up behind a tree. Gulping in breaths he tried to calm down, telling himself he was only out of breath because of the exercise._

_It did not take long for the dog and Adam, his assigned partner, to find him._

_He looked at the dog. It looked back maliciously, probably deciding on how to kill him._

Get a grip, Clarington. These are well behaved, perfectly trained dogs, stop being a pussy.

"_You're a fast runner, Hunter", Adam complimented him. _

"_Thanks."_

"_You want to take her?" Adam held out the leash to him._

"_I'll pass."_

"_You need to get over your stupid fear", Adam chastised him, stopping. Hunter kept walking, not looking back._

"_And I will. One step at a time", he promised, glancing back over his shoulder where Adam was letting the dog loose._

"_She just wants to play", he insisted as the dog ran towards Hunter. Tasting bile, he stumbled a step backwards, vision going blurry. _Run!_ It was barely a thought, just the primal instinct of the prey to-get-away-__**now**_. _Gasping for breath, he ran as fast as he was humanly able, a tingling sensation between his shoulder blades._

_His thigh hurt, like someone had shoved a knife in it. Rolling on the ground, he realized that the dog had bit him in his fucking leg, still clinging to it. He kicked blindly at it, hyperventilating. Something hissed at the dog, and the pain became a bit more bearable._

_He must have passed out, because next thing he knew he was in hospital, thigh aching and strangers standing around his bed._

_His mum had picked him up, telling him she had a surprise. She'd looked pale and worried. When he'd opened the door to his room, a white, fluffy kitten were curled up on his bed._

"_Mr Puss here doesn't like dogs either", his mother said in a conspiratorial whisper. Hunter smiled, petting the cat's soft fur. "He managed to scare the dog off, can you imagine?"_

_"Badass pussy", Hunter snickered._

"...and just having my cat made me feel so much stronger. I mean, I had nightmares for awhile, and then I'd wake up and Mr Puss would be curled up next to me-"

"-occupying most of the bed", Sebastian muttered.

"-and I'd feel calm. He probably saved my leg as well, had that dog kept pulling..." Hunter shrugged, feeling a bit embarrassed confessing his fear. Sebastian rubbed his thigh gently where the scar was.

"Suddenly my fear slash respect for Mr Puss feels justified. I still say he's a spawn of satan."

"Possibly", Hunter said with an eye-roll. Sebastian put his arm around him, drawing him in for a kiss.

"For the record, I'm not very fond of dogs either. Birds, on the other hand-"

"Oh come on! Birds are boring pets."

"Fish are worse."

"At least they're not noisy."

"Mmm. I still haven't forgiven the cat-demon. Although I am happy he saved your leg as I am very fond of both of them", he amended, running his hand down Hunters thigh, this time aiming a bit further up.

Hunter rolled his eyes, swatting his hand away. "As usual you're being overdramatic."

"He was chewing on the bird,_ in my bed."_

"I'll let you sleep in mine for the rest of the year."

"...as long as you'll sleep there to."


End file.
